Birthday: A Day of Memory & Hope


My mother’s birthday was on the fifteenth of September. It was the ninth year that I “celebrated” her birthday without her.

My mother died nine years ago, in 2008. In the beginning it was hard. I was especially close with my mom. I told her everything, or as much as any teenage girl told their mom anyway. Even when I went off to college to live in the dorms, I used to stay up late talking to her on the phone.

It’s been nine years since my mother died. I still think about her everyday. Lately, I’ve been thinking about her more, since the birth of my daughter. I wish that my mom could have lived to see my daughter.

But things happen and you can’t change the past. You can only go forward in life.

Every year, I think of my mom on her birthday. I think of how she died. I think of the memories that we shared when I was a child, a teenager, and a college student. Her birthday is not just another day. It is a day to remember the woman who gave birth to me. It is a day to remember the influence that she had on me. And finally, it is a day to remember and then pass the memories on to my child.



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Hi! I'm Helen and I am a 32 year old biracial millennial mom raising two multiracial children. I am a writer, English consultant, and social media manager. I am a self-proclaimed chocoholic.

8 thoughts on “Birthday: A Day of Memory & Hope

  1. Your post touched me, Helen. My mom passed away in 2004, and while the pain has eased, the missing has not. Our moms never really leave us, though–don’t you often hear her advice in your head? I hear my mom’s words coming out of my mouth, particularly when I’m speaking with my daughters, and I just have to laugh and be grateful for all her wisdom. Your daughter will know her grandmother through your sharing of beautiful memories.

    1. I’m so sorry about your mom’s passing. It’s always so hard when a parent` dies no matter how long it’s been. It’s funny how you don’t realize their huge influence on you until after their death.
      I also often see my mom through my words and actions with my own daughter. I also see my mom in my daughter too. (Funny how genetics works).
      But anyway, I will definitely keep my mom alive through memories, the only thing that ever truly endures.

  2. I think that must be especially difficult when you lose your mum before the births of your own children. I’m sorry that she’s not there to see your daughter grow up (and to see you become a mother yourself) but it’s lovely that you commemorate her birthday. Happy Birthday to her!

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